Saturday, June 18, 2005

So Much

Wow! I am still surprised every day by just how much there is involved with getting divorced. I can now understand why people pay lawyers so much to do it for them.

I have my son with me again. His dad failed to return him home after a weekend visit and had him for about two weeks. Many people asked why I didn't just go and take my son back. I wanted to go through the proper legal paths and I didn't want it to be a stressful situation for my son. I wish I hadn't had to do it the way I did, but my son is happy and healthy and with me. As his dad said more than once he only wants custody of our son to punish me. I want custody of our son becuase I believe in the long run, after all this settles down, my maternal instincts and pure undieing love will ensure my son a happy healthy life.

I am not saying his dad won't be in his life. I have seen how much my son loves his dad and enjoys spending time with him, I can not denia my son something he enjoys, no matter my feelings towards the man. But I have also seen how my son behaves after spending time with his dad. Especially after the extended stay, my son is very clingy. He will not be in a room without me and often spends all day in some sort of physical contact with me. He has been in my lap this entire morning. He has reverted back to not allowing me to go to the restroom alone. The progress we had been making towards potty training is almost all gone.

I know the divorce is effecting my son and that is some of the reason for the reverting, this breaks my heart. However, I believe that staying together will be more detrimental to my son than this period of adjustment.

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