Thursday, May 05, 2005

Why I Feel Like I am Falling (Really Just Another Sad Little Rant)

As of Tuesday, May 3 I am no longer living in my home in Wasilla. My son and I find ourselves somewhat set up in the downstairs of my mothers house. Two weeks now away from my husband. It took a number of years for me to gather the courage to remove myself from that place and situation, but I have done it. That goodness for the help of my family. I could not have done it with out them, especially with my precious soon-to-be three year old in tow. I want the world for him and was very afraid I would not be able to provide for him during this low period. But mom is giving me a chance to get on my feet before I venture this single mother stuff on my own. So now I am stuck with these feeling of being nearly 30, with a child, and living with my mother. Can you say guilt? I feel very spoilt. Living with my husband I spent many years making due and barely getting by and now I have a washer and dryer that do not require quarters and does not require me to haul my stuff out to it! Ah, the simple pleasures of a mom. Now I have to find day care and a job, or is it a job and day care? Either way it is another scary step that I am trying to not dread taking. I have been pushed to my limits of comfort so much in the past couple days.

So there it is a poorly formatted shout to the world. I HAVE LEFT MY HUSBAND. Please stop asking about it for a bit, I'll get there.

1 comment:

Wendy said...

I have been there. I know how scary it can be, but it gets better. Trust me it gets a lot better.